As a chronic illness and mental health and wellness blogger, particularly one who is managing my chronic illness well, one may think I have also navigated how to follow a healing diet well.  I have not.   

I searched through this blog about twenty times.  I’m finding it really hard to believe I haven’t written an entire post on diet yet, but I can’t find it.  Which means, it’s time.   

This also means, it is not a topic I gravitate toward discussing.  It’s not because I don’t think it’s important, or that I don’t like to talk about it. 

It’s just that people really want to know THE way.  They want THE diet.  They want me to tell them what I did in steps 1-7, and I don’t think this is a good way for me to help you. 

Getting all the other stuff right is far more important for true healing to happen: (i.e. mental health, mindset, social support, etc – basically all the other topics I talk about on here).

Not only are other things more important, but not every diet works for every person.  I could tell you what I ate (or didn’t) and you could try it and if it didn’t work, all it means is it didn’t work for you.  

Maybe your body is deficient in something mine is getting way to much of, and me telling you to eat more protein isn’t going to help.

What I CAN do is share with you the lessons I learned from doing it all wrong. 

So, instead of telling you what TO do, I will be sharing the:

top three things you should NOT do in order to follow a healing diet well.

 

1 – Don’t Obsess

This is my hang-up with diets.  If you are the slightest bit OCD, of which I have a tendency to be, then you can get a little diet obsessed.  

I tried two diets as I healed from Interstitial Cystitis.  Most people think the second one I did (which I will discuss in #2) is the most torturous diet.  However, after the first diet I tried, this one was a walk in the park.  The first diet I followed was the IC Diet, and it sucks.

I’m not saying it doesn’t work, but it sucks.  It’s an abstinence diet.  Anything delicious?  Don’t eat it.  Hey, did you notice the gooey looking chocolate in the glass case when you walked in?  Don’t even think about it.  Stressed?  Want a class of wine?  Yeah – no.  Have some water or milk instead.

With IC, they believe our bladder linings are missing or have become inflamed and, in this state, our nerves are exposed.

The theory goes that one should then abstain from any acidic foods as these will result in more acidic urine, and in turn, the acid urine will literally piss off our bladders. 

I’m still not sure I totally buy all of this, because from what I’ve read, acidic foods turn alkaline in our bodies, but fine, whatever, I followed the IC diet for a very long time.

The problem was not so much with the diet.  It was my obsession with it.  If we went out to dinner, I would scour the menu, making sure I found something without any triggers, and then my evening was totally ruined, because I was worried the entire time that despite my efforts, there was still something in the food I was eating which was going to make me hurt later.

I kept food journals.  I consulted every online forum.  I was left eating chicken and carrots for a very long time.  If I ever dared eating or drinking something I wasn’t sure was safe, I would become consumed with the thought of my impending bladder doom.

Anxiety Doesn’t Help, Friend

Another common corollary condition of those with a chronic condition is anxiety.  This is a chicken or the egg sort of conundrum, because, yeah, when you are have chronic pain or have chronic symptoms, anxiety is something to be expected.

However, anxiety and stress make the symptoms worse.  In my own case, I know shortly after or during my stressing, my bladder will also start to freak out.

When you have to follow a restrictive diet, you suddenly realize how much food is a part of everything.  Everyone is always talking about it.  Everyone is always eating it (how dare they).  Everyone is always flaunting it in their glass case windows and warming it up in the microwave.  

I hate to have to break it to you, but, you will not be able to avoid it, and this is something you should probably make amends with now. 

We need food.  Food is good.  Food is our pal.

It’s when the food thoughts consume us, instead of us consuming the food, and we start thinking things like “I’ll never be able to eat that again” or “it’s not fair she gets to eat that and I don’t” or “I wonder if the knife they used to cut the bread touched an onion” – when things get a bit rough.

So, the problem then, is not the diets themselves, but the fear we allow ourselves to become entangled with over them. 

I allowed my perspective on food to be dictated by my fear over pain, instead of my hope for healing.

What should you do instead of obsessing, then? What is a good perspective to have which will help you get well on your way toward healing? 

I’m glad you asked. 

Commit to following a diet for a window of time. 

This will not be your life forever, unless you decide it will be.  You are in charge of what you put in your mouth.  Eventually, you may find there is a food that bothers you, and it’s just not delicious enough to make it worth the pain. 

Think of it as liberation from the pain instead

of incarceration from the pleasure.

Some foods may have to be avoided forever, but, I found, with the IC diet, I only needed to follow it until my bladder healed, and I stick to it when I flare now as well.  Take control of your diet.  Don’t let fear over food control you and your every thought.

2 – Don’t Search for the Magic Diet 

There are a stupid amount of diets out there promising to solve all of your bodily woes. 

There are books and prepaid programs, and “wellness coaches” on Instagram all telling you their diet is the BEST diet and you should most definitely try it or most certainly die.  Diet or die trying.

I’m just going to say it: if you think your diet is the magic diet, you are wrong. 

There are most certainly benefits to many of the popular diets surfacing in our food obsessed culture, and trust me, I have watched every documentary on every way of eating there is.  I was vegan for about three days.  I was keto for a week.  

Ok, and let’s be careful, because there likely are some terrible diets.  An all donut diet: probably bad.  Carbogenic Diet:  may kill ya.  Meato Diet:  No idea, but it sounds gross.   

So yes, I do believe some diets are better than others.  There is the Auto Immune Protocol diet, which is something I try to follow on a regular basis, because eating whole foods found in nature, not made by scientists in a lab, makes sense to me.  However, I did not follow it while I was healing.

The second diet I tried was the Elimination Diet.  I like this one because it is individualized. 

Everyone starts with the same liquid diet for two days (and you swear you are going to die or at least lose 10 pounds – I lost nothing-  It was disappointing).  

After you spend a couple weeks staying away from foods which commonly cause intolerance/allergies/inflammation in the body, you start to introduce foods like one introduces them to a baby.  If your body responds with symptoms, then it’s likely a food you are going to want to avoid.

This diet jived with what I was trying to do.  I wasn’t sure what bothered my bladder and I wanted to give my gastro-intestinal system a chance to take a little break.

However, I know there are a handful of other really great diets which probably would have been just as effective.  My point is, don’t freak out over finding the perfect diet. 

If you never pick one and never actually move forward, then you’re doing nothing for yourself.

Additionally, as soon as you put your head in the thought pattern of “this diet is going to help heal my body” then the diet is going to start healing your body.  Honestly, this may even work with the donut diet, but don’t tell my doctor I said that.  

Really though, I don’t care if it’s the AIP or “I shall eat like a rabbit for the rest of my life” diet; if you tell yourself you are getting well, and you are eating a healthy diet, your body is going to respond. 

3. Don’t Cheat

Your brain is smart.  It knows if you are cheating, and it will tell your body you are cheating, and your body will probably already know, because you ate something and things got squirrelly up in there. 

Remember, I don’t want you obsessing.  So, if a salad has some unknown items and you accidentally ate one, calm down pal.  Step off the ledge.  You are not a cheater.  Your body isn’t going to leave you.

It’s all about what we tell ourselves and how we frame our thoughts over what we put in our mouths.  If we cheat (on purpose – no obsessing), we tell ourselves we can’t do it.  We tell ourselves we don’t care enough about our bodies to give this whole diet thing an honest effort.  These are not things I want you to say to yourself.

I want you to tell yourself that you will try anything to get your body into the most perfect environment for healing.  I want you to like yourself enough to give it a shot.  

Don’t think I don’t know.  I know some of you don’t think you’re worth the effort.  I know I didn’t, at least for a while.  

I didn’t think anything would help.  I didn’t think I was worthy of being healed, because I had handled things so poorly. 

I also didn’t think I was someone capable of following a strict diet.  I was the girl who ate oatmeal cream pies and grape pop at lunch every day in high school.  I was not one of the girls who talked about nutrition, counted calories, and discussed the detriments of dairy.

 Except, now I was.  Somehow I morphed from being the sad, exhausted, lost cause into the hopeful, try anything, flower about to bloom.  I didn’t care if I had to drop certain foods for a while, or forever, if it meant I could get my life back.   

Food only has as much power as we allow it.

You are in charge, friend.  You are the creator of your own food destiny.  You can honor yourself enough to feed your body foods which can heal, or you can grovel in self pity and continue to eat things which are holding your cells back from the fight. 

Don’t hold back on moving forward because you’re too scared you may pick the wrong diet.  Just pick one and run with it.  Chances are there has to be something about it which is going to help you.  And if it doesn’t, move on to the next. 

Diet is only as effective as we allow it to be.  Your thoughts over the process will dictate how well you follow it and how well it works.  

Believe you are worth healing.   

Believe your body is capable of healing. 

Believe in the possibility of feeling well. 

If you do that, and you do what is good and right for your body and mind, I am confident you are going to get yourself to a place of wellness.  I’m so excited for you.  Go get ‘em, food warrior!

P.S.  I commonly eat many of the foods I stayed away from as my body was healing.  I still try to eat whole foods as much as possible, but donuts: yum (sometimes).  Beer: please (more than I should).  Make food your bitch.  Not the other way around, friend.  You’ve totally got this.